


The best wink... in the world

by FlyingMocha



Category: The Grand Tour (TV) RPF, Top Gear (UK) RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Richard Hammond's Crash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-13
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-11-13 14:42:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11187264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyingMocha/pseuds/FlyingMocha
Summary: "Sorry about the car," Richard said.  "I'm guessing by the smoke that I've binned it?"James blew out a stress-filled chuckle and nodded at that.  "Ever so slightly, yes."(It's an absolute mush-fest.  Because I don't enjoy my classes this semester and I felt like writing this instead.)





	The best wink... in the world

**Author's Note:**

> This kind of fits in with the world in which Sanctuary in the Storm lives, with Hammond and May involved in a romantic relationship with the knowledge and consent of their wives. Title and the related quote come from Clarkson's post-accident article on Drivetribe. And in case there's any confusion, of course this is 100% fiction, no disrespect intended, I claim no ownership over the material, on-screen personas... all that stuff.

"It's all right, fellas. He winked at me." It was, Jeremy decided almost instantly, the best radio transmission that would ever be. Nothing would ever top it. When he'd realised it was Hammond's car that had crashed and become engulfed in flames, he was beset with absolute certainty that he'd just witnessed his colleague's last moment on Earth. Jeremy could tell by the wild-eyed screaming that May had come to the same conclusion and, perhaps in the least thought-out decision he'd ever made, Jeremy had grabbed him in a combination bearhug/restraint hold. The depth of James' grief was overwhelming to even the emotionally-driven ape, although he understood it. He remembered with painful clarity the grief he'd experienced at the loss of his marriage, and that couldn't possibly compare to this loss. In hindsight, Jeremy would consider that he probably should have cared whether or not some idiot was tweeting a photo of him holding a sobbing James against his chest, but in the moment, not a damn was given.

Jeremy cringed when he saw their team's main security bloke run down the hill to go actually look behind the screen at the body the paramedics were tending to. That man was made of something tougher than diamond, Jeremy mused. Then, one of the audio guys ran over to tell them he could hear Hammond talking. While James and Jeremy stared at him, struggling to make sense of that information in light of the bleeding obvious fact that nobody could have survived the accident, they heard on the radio still stuck in Jeremy's hand, that beautiful statement: "He winked at me." The two colleagues stared at one another and as if they'd discussed it telepathically, turned to walk towards the chaotic scene, side by side each with one arm holding onto the other for support against whatever visual trauma they were about to inflict upon themselves.

James hitched up as they came to the scene, and without a second thought, Jeremy let go of him and took a couple steps further. Just as it was right that James hesitate to look at his lover's potentially battered body, so it was also right that Jeremy, as ringleader, take responsibility for that first look. When he did finally get eyes on Hammond, he burst into unexpected laughter. The youngest of their team was lying on the ground, arms folded up behind his head to support it in the style of a pillow, so the sun wasn't so directly in his eyes. When he saw Jeremy standing there, he winced slightly, giving the taller man a rather embarrassed look.

"James, come here," Jeremy said, glancing over just enough to know that May was still frozen to the spot, just beyond Richard's line of sight. "James," he said again, extended a hand toward him, "James James James, quit being a girl and get over here, he's all right." That spurred the man to brush the tears off his cheeks and step forward, although he still kept his eyes firmly locked on Jeremy as he did.

"Sorry about the car," Richard said, and that was the thing that finally prompted James to turn his head. Jeremy watched as James' eyes went wide all over again, this time in surprise and relief instead of horror and grief. "I'm guessing by the smoke that I've binned it?" James blew out a stress-filled chuckle and nodded at that.

"Ever so slightly, yes." He finally moved toward Richard's head, dropping to his knees on the grass as his fingers stretched out to caress Richard's brow, then run gently through his hair. Now, Jeremy was thinking about photographers and annoying spectators with cell phones, and he positioned his body to reduce the opportunity for a clear photo. He recognised James' touch as not altogether tender; he was looking for signs of head injury. They were probably all having traumatic memories of Hammond's other horrifying accident, right about now. This one, in Jeremy's opinion, had been much worse. He wasn't sure if that was because of the post-accident fire, the fact that somebody had initially referred to Richard as merely a body, or just because he'd seen it happen. He really didn't care about any of that, though, or indeed even about logic. This was the worst accident ever, full stop.

"Are you really all right?" James asked. Richard gave a quizzical look at James' watery smile. Obviously he was all right; why was James asking? What on earth..? Richard's musing was interrupted by a shock of pain as one of the medical professionals began securing his left leg in quite possibly the most uncomfortable splint ever.

"Hurt my knee a bit," Richard answered. "Probably sprained it or something, and I think I'm bruised, but I'm really all right. Didn't hit my head. My crash helmet is probably destroyed but it did its job. They're planning to fly me to the hospital so I don't have to endure a long ambulance ride. You and Jeremy will follow in the van, right? You're my medical proxy when Mindy can't be here; they've been made aware of that." James nodded, his smile getting a little more confident now.

"Of course we'll be there. Do you want us to start driving now?" he asked. Jeremy shot a look of awe at his colleague when he heard that question. He knew James probably wanted nothing more than to lie down on the grass and curl his body around Richard until the last moment when they would have to load him up in the helicopter. He understood the personal sacrifice James was making by asking the question. And Jeremy understood the obligation that he was placing upon himself to support James through the long drive to the hospital. Or maybe it wasn't a long drive, Jeremy wasn't sure, but he knew it was going to feel long, regardless.

Richard nodded, then beckoned James to come closer. Jeremy and the security bloke both instinctively moved closer and crouched down, using their bodies to protect the privacy of their colleagues as James leant down to press a kiss to Richard's pursed lips, as if drawn by overwhelming gravitational force.

"I'll go now, and I'll be there as soon as I can," James said, cautiously eyeing the medical team member who was obviously preparing to move Richard. Jeremy suspected that they needed to be out of earshot when the moving began, or Richard's pained moans might trigger James to octopus-like clinginess, or worse, upset him badly enough to go fighty on them. Jeremy didn't want to deal with either option, if it could be avoided.

"You're going in the van," the security bloke said as he pointed at the van that was now much closer to them than it had been when Jeremy arrived on the scene. "Someone's already in there waiting to drive you." Jeremy nodded and glanced back down at James, who was at this point all the way down on the ground, sharing a whispered conversation with Richard. Jeremy's lip-reading skills were just sufficient enough to know that words of love were being exchanged. He glanced away, giving the pair at least a little privacy. A moment later, James rose to his knees, extending a hand in a wordless request that Jeremy answered by tugging him to his feet.

"Be safe," Richard said as they started away from him.

"You too," Jeremy said, with all the stern, commanding presence he could muster before it gave way to one last relieved grin. James nearly ran to the van, and Jeremy followed suit, glad for an excuse not to look too closely at the burnt-out wreck. When he got to the van, James was already inside, head in hands, trembling mightily. Glancing at the windows that somebody had taken the time to cover over with papers and gaffer tape, Jeremy slammed the door behind himself and hunched over to grab James in an awkward hug. He wasn't sure it was the right thing to do for their mildly touch-averse colleague, and when James responded with a horrifyingly painful, soul-crushing sob, he was even more sure that this might not have been a good idea. Jeremy wasn't entirely sure how to handle James when the younger man was playing by their usual rules. He had no idea what to do now that the rulebook had gone up in flames with the Rimac. A moment later, Jeremy realised some of the tears falling onto his shirt were his own, and he decided that obviously the correct choice here was to join James in allowing all of the grief and fear, all the horrible feelings of terror, flow out in a good, cathartic cry. Best to get this out of their systems before they got there and had to put on a brave face for Richard, after all.

"I thought…" James tried to say, somewhere during the ride. Jeremy ran his hands through James' hair, surprising the younger man as he found himself being pressed against Jeremy's chest rather against his will.

"I know," Jeremy said softly, "me too. Get it all out now, so Hammond doesn't see you like this; it's all right." James drew in a shaky, deep breath as he began to understand the situation in which they now found themselves. While Jeremy does tend to embrace his hands-on nature, he never did this with James who preferred to keep a little more distance from people with whom he wasn't romantically involved. But in the moments after the accident, that mutual understanding had broken down as the need for moral support had sucker-punched the both of them. And now, they had limited time to deal with the residual reactions of feelings too big to bottle up. Uncomfortable with this level of contact, James nevertheless chose to allow it, his arms working their way around Jeremy as he clung onto the one stable thing in a world that had turned itself completely inside out within the past… unspecified timeframe, James decided, when he realised he had no idea how much time had elapsed.

By the time the trio were reunited in the hospital, the diagnosis had already come -- a broken leg, which required surgery, and at least four pins, to put it back together properly. James flinched at that, but Richard smiled encouragingly as he explained that the injury would actually heal faster and less painfully this way. James wasn't entirely sure he believed this, but he did seem to remember that when one of his mates suffered a broken arm in a motorbike wreck a few years ago, it healed a lot faster than his foot had when he'd broken it in a childhood tree-climbing mishap. Still… they'd been meant to fly home that evening, and now… well, he and Jeremy were free to fly home on schedule, he supposed, but he didn't plan to do that, and he was pretty sure Jeremy wasn't going anywhere just yet, either. Jeremy stepped out into the hall to update Andy Wilman, who James assumed was still at the accident scene dealing with an entire forest's worth of paperwork, and James texted Sarah telling her what happened, and not to expect him home yet. He made sure to lead off with the news that everyone was safe, but he knew that Richard had taken up a special place in her heart over the years, and she would likely call as soon as she saw the message, anyway. When he looked back up from his phone, Richard was staring at his own phone, having gone almost as pale as the hospital gown he was dressed in.

"What's wrong, love?" James asked, belatedly glancing around to be sure nobody had overheard that. He was pretty sure their relationship was an open secret, but still.

"Somebody put pictures and a video of the accident on Twitter," Richard answered. "I… I didn't know… oh, James. No wonder you looked so scared." Richard dropped his phone into his lap and stretched out both arms, not sure if he was offering a supportive hug to his lover or seeking reassurance and comfort from him. Either way, when Jeremy returned, he found the two of them holding tight to one another, sniffling and blinking at held-back tears.

"Are you in pain, Hammond?" Jeremy asked, shooting Richard a worried look.

James shook his head in answer. "He saw the accident on Twitter," he explained simply. "Video too, not just photographs." Richard let go of James with one arm and stretched it out towards Jeremy, clearly indicating that he was expected to turn their hug into a three-way affair. If it had been even a slightly less serious moment, Jeremy would have struggled to choose among the dozen or so inappropriate jokes vying for attention in his mind. Instead, he simply stepped alongside the bed and leant over, one arm wrapped around James and the other folded up alongside Richard in a pseudo-embrace that wouldn’t hurt his injured colleague.

"Did you think I had died?" Richard asked after a moment. Before Jeremy could muster up a confident chuckle and reassurances otherwise, the youngest of the trio spoke again. "That's what I would have thought, if I'd seen it. And -- Christ, James, you were behind me, did you watch it happen? You did think that, didn't you?" Richard pressed his head back into the pillow, doing his best to make eye contact with the other two who by this point had given up on that brave-face stuff they'd planned. James nodded solemnly, causing Richard to wince in empathetic agony and draw closer to them again. "I am so, so sorry," he said softly, nearly whispering into both their ears at once from his place between them. "That you had to go through that, again, so soon after the last one… and… mates…" he whispered, his harsh sighs speaking volumes about the regret he felt for having been the cause of such enormous heartache.

"You want to close the door before you do that?" a familiar voice asked, startling all three of them.

"Andy!" Richard said with a big smile. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to--" he stopped when their boss put a hand up.

"I expect a full explanation of what happened when you're not lying broken in hospital on pain meds, but I don't want your apologies. It wasn't intentional, I know that. Just came to let you know I've gotten you, Jeremy and James, a suite at the nearest hotel. Two beds, but only one bedroom, sorry. Best I could do on short notice, now that every news person in the world wants to stick around here a few more days." Jeremy and James both made noises of understanding. "There's going to be some discussion about trying to move Rich back home for surgery, but this isn't a bad place to get the job done, if it comes to that, so if either or both of you want to stay until he's ready to go home, I'll make it happen. Also…" he trailed off, letting his hands do the talking as he hoisted three duffel bags into view.

"Clothes that haven't been cut apart by paramedics!" Richard nearly shouted with glee.

"My phone charger!" Jeremy said, almost as excited as Richard was.

"Gin!" James said much more calmly, but with an excited grin.

"You have gin?" everyone in the room said, their words overrunning one another. James gave them all a perplexed look.

"Of course I do. You didn't think I fill the whole bag with clothes, did you? I'm not an overly-groomed Hamster!"

"I figured it was your spanner collection, honestly," Jeremy said with a wry smile, causing the room to erupt in laughter, followed quickly by a small groan as Richard squirmed.

"All right, laughing hurts… didn't know that," he muttered. "And I thought it was just books and spare pants."

"I have a book, as well," James mused as he dug through the bag. "It's by a neuroscientist on the workings of… hey, two bottles of gin!" He grinned as he held up the pair, one more well-used than the other. "I must have forgotten to unpack the one from our last trip." Andy merely shook his head and poked around until he found a supply cabinet with disposable cups in it.

"I'll check with the doctor to find out if Richard can have this," Jeremy muttered as he leant out into the hall.

Andy watched him go, then poured a small amount of gin into the first of the cups. "He must have hit his head getting into the van if he thinks we care about that," Andy said with a grin as he handed it over to the patient. Richard took a small sip, then a moment later closed his eyes with a relaxed expression.

"Either the painkillers suck in this country or it hurts a lot worse than I realised, but this is helping," he said gratefully. Just then, Jeremy returned with a nurse in tow.

"Only two!" she said, pointing sternly at Richard before leaving again.

After they'd drunk enough to feel sufficiently calmed, Andy took his leave, making sure to leave the address of the hotel written down for the others. A few minutes later, Jeremy yawned and decided it was time to turn in for the night. "You go ahead," James said. "I'm going to stay here tonight. He shouldn't be left alone in a hospital, in a foreign country, when he's both injured and tipsy." Jeremy's eyes filled with mirth at the obviously weak explanation for why Richard shouldn't be left alone overnight, but rather than taking the opportunity to screw with James for going so obviously soft, instead he stepped towards the bed and extended his arms again, wordlessly signalling the expectation of a group hug before he retired to the hotel. James gave him a strange look but obliged, both of them leaning forward carefully to not interfere with Richard's IV and whatever else was attached to him.

"No more of this, all right?" Jeremy said softly as he gently squeezed both of them. He pressed a somewhat uncharacteristic parental kiss into Richard's hair. "Love you," he said softly. "Both of you," he added, pressing an entirely uncharacteristic and completely alarming parental kiss into James' hair. James thought for a moment of taking a screaming run at the room's window to escape the… the girly… whatever, that had obviously taken over, but when he looked at Jeremy, his blood ran cold and it felt as though his heart had emerged from his chest for the specific purpose of punching him in the gut. Jeremy's eyes had gone well past the misty stage; tears were welling up and threatening to overflow. Again.

This accident had taken a heavy toll on them all, James realised, in ways that might take days or weeks to even fully discover within themselves. No wonder Jeremy's words and actions were running counter to his usual method of using insults to communicate affection. James mentally gave himself permission to join Jeremy on his hopefully-temporary journey through Opposite Land. Jeremy had, after all, been through quite a lot of crap in the not so distant past, and the possibility had to be considered that he knew more than James did about how to emerge victorious from a painful chapter of one's life. James drew up every morsel of strength he felt like he'd ever developed in his entire life, and pushed aside the thought of running away in favour of following Jeremy's slightly questionable leadership.

"Love you too," Richard muttered in response. James wasn't surprised to hear those words from him. A little jealous, perhaps, but of course those words meant something far different in relation to Jeremy than they did to James. Anyway, he'd always known that Richard had looked up to Jeremy as some strange combination of hero, mentor, and playmate in the early days, and of course he knew that the two had developed a brotherly bond somewhere along the way.

What did surprise him was to hear another "love you" emerging from his own lips. James blinked in shock for a second, as did Jeremy who clearly also didn't expect this from his somewhat aloof colleague. After a second, James gave a small, confident nod as if to confirm his words, and a smile finally spread across Jeremy's face.

"Call me if you need anything, or if he does," Jeremy said, throwing a jovial arm around James and giving him a gentle squeeze. "Even if you just need to be boring and pedantic at three in the morning, all right?" James nodded in agreement, and shortly, the room was empty of all but the two lovers.

"I'm really sorry you went through that," Richard said again. "It must have looked so much worse than the video made it seem, if you two are flinging the L-word around like that." James gave a weak smile in reply. Richard was right, but he clearly already knew that, so James saw no need to acknowledge it.

"You should rest," he said. "I'll just curl up and read my book." The only answer was the sound of the bed motor whirring to life as Richard adjusted it to a nearly flat position. James made himself comfortable in the recliner the staff had brought for him, and they fell into a companionable silence for quite a long while, only interrupted by nurses coming in to change Richard's fluid bag and dispense pain medication. James alternated between dozing lightly and reading, while Richard seemed content to watch the television in between bouts of sleep. Just around sunrise, as James was launching into the next chapter of his book, a pained sigh drew his attention away. "What's wrong, love?" he asked, watching Richard squirm in between flinches and grunts that spoke of severe discomfort. "Are you hurting, do you need more medication, what do you need?"

"You," Richard answered as he continued to move. James scooted closer so he could hold Richard's hand, the gesture went ignored. After a moment, it became evident what he was up to. The doctors had splinted his broken leg and propped on a rather uncomfortable-looking cushion, and bit by tiny bit, he was shifting the cushion to the edge of the bed, carefully dragging himself along with.

"Stop that," James chided, even as he got up to help. He knew full well that telling Richard to stop was roughly the same as telling him to plough ahead with wild abandon. If Richard was going to paste himself to the left-hand side of the bed, up against the railing to be as close as possible to James, then the least James could do was lend a hand so he wouldn't do himself further injury. When he finally fell still again, James ran his fingers through Richard's messy hair, frowning slightly when a fragment of glass lightly pierced his fingertip, just enough to stick itself velcro-style to him. "Do I need to check for more glass in your hair or was that the last of it?" James asked as he showed off his discovery. Richard snickered at the sight.

"Someone actually did take care of that," he answered. "They must have missed that bit." Richard watched James drop the shard into the nearby bin, then grabbed and tugged at James as if he expected the older man to climb over the bed rail. "Come around to this side," Richard instructed, gesturing at the side of the bed farthest from his injured leg. James did so, developing a sinking feeling that he knew what the next request would be. "Now get in," Richard said, confirming James' concerns.

"I can't do that, sweetheart, there's not enough room, I could hurt you." Even as he said the words, his resolve had already melted from the truly stunning puppy-dog eyes staring up at him.

"You don't have to stay all night," Richard said. "Please. You asked what I need." James sighed, already mentally bracing himself for the inevitable yelling when a nurse or orderly or, God forbid, a stray reporter who got past security, walked in. He lowered the side rail, eased himself alongside Richard's body, limbs sliding around Richard as if they'd been training for years just to solve this puzzle. Something bumped at his hip and James flinched, expecting a nurse to be behind him, gathering up steam to start yelling, but when he glanced, he realised it was just the bed rail that Richard had reached over him to pull back up.

"I'm only staying for a few minutes," James said softly as Richard's arms found their way around him. The younger man hummed his agreement, then let his eyes drift closed. James could feel Richard's muscles relaxing bit by bit, the day's trauma seeming to bleed out of his body in response to being in close proximity to someone he trusted.

"Love you," Richard muttered, turning his head to steal a chaste kiss. 

"Love you too, sweetheart," James responded, breathing in the sheer joy of getting to hear those words. Richard made a small, happy sound as he slipped into a slightly less restless sleep. Maybe just a couple more minutes, James decided, if it was having this positive an effect on Richard. 

\---

Jeremy lurched to a stop in the doorway, causing Andy to face-plant into his back with a grumbled curse that communicated exactly what he thought of that nasty surprise. When Jeremy stepped aside into the doorway, however, Andy saw what had caused his friend to hitch up. Wordlessly, Andy stepped inside and closed the door. Jeremy could tell by the state of Richard's IV fluids, that it wasn't going to be much longer before someone came in, and they probably weren't going to be too happy to find Richard tangled in James' protective embrace. He thought briefly of waking James before it came to that, but when he glanced at Andy and nodded towards the conglomeration of human occupying the hospital bed, Andy shook his head.

"It's the most relaxed either of them has looked since the accident," Andy whispered. "Let them be. Anyway, the longer they sleep, the more gin we don't have to share." Jeremy grinned broadly at that, already digging through James' bag for the bottle.

**Author's Note:**

> If anyone sees any technical or investigative data about this accident going around online, maybe share a link? My student research is on the safety of lithium ion vehicles compared to hydrogen fuel cell vehicles in high-speed accidents, so... yeah.


End file.
